


Pillow talk

by Centum



Category: Star Wars Legends: The Old Republic
Genre: M/M, SWTOR, malavai quinn - Freeform, theron shan - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-10
Updated: 2016-01-10
Packaged: 2018-05-12 23:43:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,794
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5686210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Centum/pseuds/Centum
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Pillow talk in Urban Dictionary: The conversation that happens after making out/sex. It's infinitely better than normal conversation because there's touching involved.<br/>Both my pairings are having a fluffy moment: First Theron and Marnh, then Malavai and Marne.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Pillow talk

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first time I sat down and decided I want to write about Theron and Marnh. I had no idea what they will talk about when I started. Before this I always had a vague idea and at least one clear image of what is going on in their lives. Now I just closed my eyes and pretended to be Theron, and he really surprised me with this one.

**Theron & Marnh:**

Marnh is doing his magic. With his tongue. I literally see galaxies. One gentle finger is inside me, carefully pressing the sensitive spot there. I'm trying to stroke him smoothly, but it gets difficult when you are so much in ecstasy you forget how to breath.

And then he comes all over my hand so deliciously it makes me to explode into his mouth. The sexiest thing I know in this world is my husband coming.

Marnh licks the last drops and then crawls next to me. He kisses my neck, humming from the satisfaction and I have to chuckle at it. I take the blanket and cover us with it so he wouldn't get cold. He freezes so easily, and I can't stand him being uncomfortable.

"Theron, do you like children?" I suddenly hear a hesitant voice next to my ear.

"Eh? Shouldn't you ask things like that before the priest says "amen"? Because it is a bit late now if you have decided to start popping babies into this world and I say I actually hate them."

One fast hand comes out from under the blanket and pinches me on the cheek.

"Ouch, and what is it with this domestic violence? I should have known this will follow if you marry a Zabrak. Feisty bunch, or so I have heard."

I lift my head so I can kiss him on the top of the head, right between the horns.

"Alright, I'm serious. I do like children, but I really haven't been with these mini-people so much. Why do you ask?"

Marnh has decided it is time to be serious and very cute, and moves to rest his chin on my chest. He looks to me from there with yellow eyes and I can see there is something coming. Something that's been bothering him. I sometimes wish he wouldn't worry so much, but on the other hand, I can't make him to stop either so why bother. I take all his worries seriously when he finally lets them out, and I try to understand them one by one. If I wouldn't do that, I wouldn't be much of a partner for him. If he needs me to handle them with him, then he needs me. It is really that simple.

"I've been thinking...well, you don't have children from your first marriage. And now you are married to me, and I can't give you any. So, if you would want to have children...it would be very difficult for you."

"Love, if having children would've been on my list of "10-things-to-do-in-this-life", I would've probably made choices that reflect that. If I, as a man, marry a man, we can presume having children was not very important to me. Marrying a person I love was much more important. But do you like children? You don't get any from me either, this goes both ways, you know?"

Marnh has to think. His finger has found my nipple and does something very nice there. I wonder should I swipe his hand away from distracting me from this important conversation.

"I haven't really even thought about children before we got married. I knew from very early in my life I'm into men. In this child-thing, sleeping with females IS something you have to do if you want them. For me it was given I will never be a father. But you are not like me. You were married to Elena."

"Are you still jealous about that? And now you worry about not being able to birth my hypothetical children?"

I have to sit up to see him properly. No, he is not jealous, I think. He is sitting up too, looking at me with serious eyes, not smiling. I wrap my arms around him.

"Now, tell me exactly where are we going with this conversation. You know I can't stand when you are worried about my presumed unhappiness with you."

"No, I'm not jealous, why would I be? Elena is a nice person. You know we get along well when we meet. It's...I have these feelings...like I really would like to have children. With you. And we can't. So, I was worried if you have the same feelings and it bothers you. I never wanted to have kids, but then we got married and I begin to have all these "we-are-family"-feelings. It is annoying, really. I feel like something is missing. Like...it would be really nice to have a child with you and be a father. And when I see children it just gets stronger."

I have to kiss that adorable man right there. He wants to have children. This is not about me wanting to have them, it is him wanting them and he is projecting.

"So, you want to have children," I correct him. "You are not really worried about me wanting children, it is you who wants them and knowing we can't make them by ourselves."

"Well...yes. I think that's how it is. And I KNOW how insane it is. Even if we would adopt, your work is dangerous and you travel a lot. I still have to worry about if the Imperium comes after me. What kind of a family would that child have? I didn't have a family, you didn't have a family. I mean, we probably would just mess the poor child for good."

"You would be a really good father, love. That child would be very loved." I have to kiss him again."About myself... I wouldn't be so sure, but...hey, if that would be possible, I would do it any time with you. You mentioned adopting, have you figured this out that far?"

Marnh lies down on the bed. He is resting his head on my lap. I begin to play with his horns again. Damn, they are a nice thing to have in a husband.

"Well...it is one of the three options we would have IF we would really do it."

"What is the second option?"

"Some woman would have to be a mother...and I can't stand the idea. Not even with the artificial fertilization. It would be half hers then. Nope. Too messy. The child would have three parents then and I don't want to share. I rather choose the adoption. Third is the cloning..."

"NO. I'm very much against cloning and I simply can't stand the idea of having a mini-me or mini-you run around here." I have to be harsh. I simply can't stand cloning. Cloning humans is something I hear about more and more in my work nowadays, and I somehow find it disgusting and unethical. Genetic engineering has been more or less an issue among some species. It has always led to degeneration and other problems. I don't want to support it in any way, but I have a feeling that at some point...Well, who knows if in distant future whole armies are done by cloning.

"I know, I know," Marnh says and kisses my leg, because my leg happens to be under his head. "We don't clone. And we don't adopt either."

"We don't?"

"No. Unless you insist. And seems to me you are alright with no mini-us."

"What made you decide you don't want to adopt either?"

He sighs. His fingers have found the hairs on my leg and are playing with them now.

Once he asked why humans must have all this hair. Zabraks manage with only the hair growing in their heads. Many don't have even that. I didn't have the courage to tell him that I'm happy he has. Me shaving was something he had to see, several times. He sat on the toilet-seat and followed my shaving with sharp eyes. "Gods, I don't get that. Hair grows in the face and then you take it all away. Humans are strange." I had to snort back: "Says a man with a scalp full of horns."

"I don't think it would be a right thing to do. You and me...we love each other to no end, but our life is dangerous. It is, you have to admit it. Even if we overlook the fact that our backgrounds are questionable and we don't know a thing about raising kids," Marnh says.

And it is true. He is a former slave and a former Dark Lord. I had no father and not much life with my mother either, and I was meant to be a Jedi. I'm thankful I didn't have a force-sensitive bone in my body, career as a spy and an agent has really been my thing. I'm an SIS-man to the bone. I wouldn't change it for anything. Sometimes I secretly think I was lucky that Marnh is the one who decided to leave his life as a Sith behind. I don't know if I could have made the same decision. I'm happy I never had to choose. I got to keep them both. Sometimes I still feel guilt for all the things he lost because of me. He had his ship and a crew, he was respected among the Sith, he was a member of the Dark Council, he had status. And he gave up all of it, to be with me, to work in the Republic Senate. His life is very different now. One more reason for me to be the best husband in the world. That, and the fact that I love him more than my life.

"I think...being married has just made me realise it actually could be possible to have a family of my own, when before it was something I never even imagined having," he continues.

My heart melts. That's my dark, beautiful husband. He has grown to realise he is not an abomination, and ordinary things like children could be for him too. And he deserves to have them, there is no question about it. But...our life is not easy or safe. We can manage when there is only two of us, but having a responsibility of a little life with us...it would be too hard.

It is hard for me to not to be able to give him what he wants. I would love to. I really would. I would let him adopt a dozen of them if there wouldn't be his past and my job. Both are dangerous.

I'm bending down to kiss him, and I make it a long, good kiss.

"Love, there is nothing in this world I wouldn't give to you if it would be just about me. But sometimes the situation is what it is."

"I know. I accept it. And it is definitely not your fault. Not my fault either. And I have something others don't have: I have you," Marnh smiles and hugs me. And then his hand goes to places and we continue the night. They tend to be long and enjoyable, these nights.

But the idea of a child...I never fully abandon it. I begin to think that maybe, if things change in some distant future and we are not actually a hundred years old, who knows what could happen. As I said, there isn't a thing in this world I wouldn't want to give to Marnh.

 

* * *

**Malavai & Marne:**

I'm lying on my side, Marne is trembling and moving inside me as slow as he can at this point. His hand is on my member, stroking it and sending starlight and sparkles through my whole body. I'm in heaven.

"Are you ready? I can't hold much longer..." He is panting in my ear.

"Yes...NOW!" Immediately he is making a few hard pushes, and then explodes in me, sending me over the edge and making me almost lose my consciousness from the sheer pleasure of it. He collapses over me, still pulsing inside me. I turn my head to find his warm lips. He is kissing me back, whispering:

"I don't want to leave your body. I want to stay like this forever".

I have to smile against his mouth. He is so sweet sometimes. But of course he has to come out when I turn around so I can face him. We are both sweaty and sticky and I have to pull the blanket over us, the air feels chilly on my skin.

I'm fondling his face with my fingers as I very often do. I love this face so much. Firm, red skin, yellow eyes that glimmer in the light, and lips so full and sexy you could just kiss them for hours. His nose is straight and I like to let my finger travel over it to his cheeks. His hair is black and he has only one braid as a decoration. Some of the Sith love jewellery and have it all over them. Not this Sith. He is those people who have a simple, yet very elegant taste. We tend to agree on this.

He is very handsome and manly.

"Are you soon done with my face?" He smiles at me. Then he is lifting his head in order to kiss me again.

"Hmm...I like your face very much. But then, I tend to like everything in you," I have to smile back to him when my mouth is free again.

"I would be sad if you wouldn't!"

I settle my head on his chest. For some time we are just lying there, in half sleep. His hand is stroking my back absently. But I don't want to sleep, I want to chat with him. It is always enjoyable because nothing makes him shy or awkward, unlike me.

"Marne, I have never asked you this, though I have often thought about it. It would be...somewhat interesting to hear about your past relationships, I mean, those before me," I finally say to him, trying to sound indifferent.

Risky, I know. He will tell me, but do I want to hear? On the other hand, it sometimes bothers me that I know nothing about his past when it comes to relationships. Well, not really bothers, not in a bad way, I don't go around ruminating it. But it has been his life and everything in him is interesting to me.

"Aha! You jealous?" He laughs and I have to slap his belly to get him back to his senses. He moves himself lower so he can face me. He is looking a bit serious. He starts playing with my hair.

"Well, what should I tell you...I have been in one longer relationship and then there has been few flings that didn't last more than a few weeks. So nothing scandalous," he begins.

"Why they didn't last?" I have to ask.

"Hard to say...maybe they were not meant to last? I think I was always unconsciously pushing them away just like I tried to do with you. Perhaps I wasn't really interested in being in a relationship to begin with. The one relationship that lasted longer...it was my first. He was my first, and I was his..." His eyes are looking somewhere in his past.

I don't want to disturb him, this is better than I expected.

"It was in the beginning of my training. We were in the same group, and from the first week we were together most of the time. Very soon we became intimate. I knew very early in my life I'm homosexual, and I was happy to meet someone who was like me. The Sith are open-minded when it comes to everything concerning sexuality. You can be openly gay and no one cares, but you are expected to still get married and make offspring. I think it would be impossible for me, I'm that gay. How was it with you, by the way? Did you always know you prefer men?"

"No," I have to answer, no matter how embarrassing it is to tell him things like that. I decide to go all the way with my confession, as we seem to be in a very intimate mood here:

"I have fancied some women. And then I have fancied some men too. It was very confusing and I didn't have anyone to talk about it. So I just kept it inside me. I didn't like the idea of...I sort of just cut the whole sex-thing from my life. Being workaholic helped."

"Well am I glad you have decided to uncut it!" He gives me a kiss and then continues:

"So, we were together most of the time we were in the training. It was...well, it was good and when it was bad, it was a real hell. I wasn't an easy partner even then. Then he told me he will marry a woman his family had chosen for him. I was infuriated. He wanted me to stay with him as his lover, while he would have been married, having children. Some people can settle with that kind of an arrangement, but not me. That was during our second year of training. So we were together... a little over a year? I never really counted. So I ended it right there. I asked to be transferred to a different Academy, and the Order accepted it. I was there for the rest of my training, before moving to Korriban Academy and becoming an acolyte. So, that was that relationship. After everything you and me have gone through, I think it hurt me more than I realised then."

"Did you love him?" I ask before I manage to stop myself, and I want to slap myself for it. It really is not my business what he has felt for the people before me.

He is taking his time before he answers, hand tangling my hair while he is thinking.

"Now, that is a good question. I think I loved him as much as I was capable of then. I was immature, and so was he. So, did I love him? Yes, so I told him and so I believed myself. Was it deep, real love? Absolutely not. It was shallow and full of drama. Like children playing home."

His fingers are scratching my scalp now and it is enjoyable. I feel like purring.

"When I say this... I don't do it to make some sort of a comparison...but with you the feeling is very different. Maybe I have grown up some, or maybe it is because we are just meant to be. But when I tell you I love you, it means to me "I love you and I want to make sure you are always happy and you always have everything you need, in every way." You are important to me in the ways I couldn't even fathom before meeting you," he says with a soft voice.

"Thank you for telling me all that, and I love you too" I have to say, because it makes me feel I know him better again.

I told him I never had anyone to talk about these things...but there he is, next to me, willing to hear my every word. There is no excuse for not making me finally go through it. So I gather all my courage and start:

"Have you ever wondered why you were my first?" I ask and turn to look him in the eyes. He nods. He keeps playing with my hair.

"Mal, you are a stunning man, absolute beauty, and you are 30. The hell you can be sure I find it fascinating."

"I think it has been a combination of many things, because when I was 25 I began to think I should do something about it, but then I didn't because I was so used to be alone, and it just felt so...messy." I have to sigh. I continue:

"My career was everything to me, literally everything. I have been very much a perfectionist because I felt I'm not good enough no matter how much I try. I poured every ounce of myself in perfecting my performance at work. There were always women and men seeking my company, I don't deny it. I just found it distracting and quite frankly, scary. Remember how scared I was of you too. I had no idea how to handle those situations...so I just run away."

"But I am scary. I'm the Wrath. I'm hate incarnated. You should be scared! Boo!" Marne makes a scary face to me and I have to laugh and slap him gently.

"You are a nice man and a cutie and you know it," I say to him. Then I have to confess:

"No, I had planned that when my career is at its peak, I will marry and have two children."

"Oh damn, if your career is now at its peak, where am I in this picture?" Marne makes every effort to look worried.

“Someone else can have my career and I'll take you, thank you very much!" I'm bending forward so I can kiss him. I make sure it is a long kiss. Then I have to keep analysing myself because I seem to get somewhere with it.

"I think...I was very confused about myself when it came to sex, and when I thought about actually making it happen...I just didn't know how, I mean, a man, a woman, do I have to date or just go to a prostitute, what? I take these things so seriously. I'm romantic. And I think I had so much problems with myself - I kept them all locked inside me. I escaped in work. Loving the Imperium was enough for me. But then...I was sent to you and everything changed. I hope I would've had at least some experience regarding sex when I met you, things would have been easier for both of us..." I have to look down from him because again I feel awkward and embarrassed.

"I hope you would've told me, but again, I understand you didn't. I was an idiot," Marne comforts me.

"Yes. I wonder how we still have any kind of Imperium at all, I mean, the Emperor is dead, the Emperor's Wrath is an idiot...ouch! Don't pull my hair, it hurts!" I have to wince. He is crawling over me.

"Grrrrr, the Emperor's Wrath is unleashed and will punish everyone who makes fun of our dead Emperor. Good riddance to him, by the way."

I'm lying under him and I have to laugh, and it turns me on so much. Everything in him is turning me on. So maybe I stayed untouched too long, but he definitely is making sure nowadays I get compensation for it.


End file.
